The more things change the more they stay the same Coming to four weeks since the end of my 'epic' journey into the mountains of the Himalayas. While home was welcome, there has been a slight dissonance between things before I left and things since I came back. Funny how I did not experience the normal dissonance one feels after a long trip overseas like the sudden change back to a familiar culture and environment or jet lag or any one of the myriad examples which I am sure you reader would understand. What I do feel one month into the return is an overwhelming feeling that things just aren't the same anymore. Nothing to do with the trip per se, just an actual change in situations and circumstances beyond by control, and neatly demarcated from the prior situation by a three week holiday.

What is disturbing is the way I have been reacting towards these changes. That is to say, I am bitchin' and cussin' continuously to all those who would hear or just happened to be within earshot, whichever is convenient for that day. A lot of bitchin' going on which makes me a very non desirable person to be around these days. One thing I do know about myself previously is that whatever changes that come, I would take them all in my stride and adapt to the situation as needed. At a time where I'm calling upon this skill to keep my sanity, it is failing and leaving me to the forces swirling around me.

One tries the very hardest to stay the course and live out the rest of the story to be had this year. But it's so hard...  ¶ 1:39:00 am