Sunday, November 13, 2005
After some time......
Well, now that the annual depression is over, I have to start facing life as a quarter centenarian. Crossed the magic marker last Thursday, a week which itself was only remarkable in that the project report after compilation was as atrocious as only a few others I have encountered before in my entire school life. Convoluted sentence structure that goes nowhere, repetitions of terms, inconsistent syntax, illogical arguments that sounded nothing like how we thrashed it out on the previous Sunday, it was certainly enough to drive the rest of us nuts as we reading it that cold Wednesday morning. The three of us just looked at each other and came to the common understanding that can only be arrived by people being buffeted by the same forces of sub-continental pride and hubris can bring to bear. It was only made worst by the sheer complexity of the area of debt financing that he was supposed to elucidate upon and needless to say, failed.
It was not the best way to end that working relationship. Admitably, I have been less than civil in my behaviour at best and I take that as a sign of my increasing degeneration as a human being. There was a slight sense of righteousness as the professor commented on his presentation style but then again, is that the right way to feel?
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Bible studies the last few weeks has been interesting to say the list. While I can't say that the process is answering the questions that I have and need answer, it has been a learning experience in what I've learnt from the Bible itself. She says that I need to pray, and the caveat, open my heart. But letting go of years of indoctrination to believe is hard. For that matter, I still haven't answer the question of why. The last year has been tough in the kind of challenges that I've had to face, with borderline depression almost a constant in my life now. The last few months has especially been excruciating, where it is almost impossible to enjoy anything since I left Nepal.
If religion's the answer, then how do I start getting peace? And if it's not, then what is? ¶ 11:13:00 pm
It was not the best way to end that working relationship. Admitably, I have been less than civil in my behaviour at best and I take that as a sign of my increasing degeneration as a human being. There was a slight sense of righteousness as the professor commented on his presentation style but then again, is that the right way to feel?
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Bible studies the last few weeks has been interesting to say the list. While I can't say that the process is answering the questions that I have and need answer, it has been a learning experience in what I've learnt from the Bible itself. She says that I need to pray, and the caveat, open my heart. But letting go of years of indoctrination to believe is hard. For that matter, I still haven't answer the question of why. The last year has been tough in the kind of challenges that I've had to face, with borderline depression almost a constant in my life now. The last few months has especially been excruciating, where it is almost impossible to enjoy anything since I left Nepal.
If religion's the answer, then how do I start getting peace? And if it's not, then what is? ¶ 11:13:00 pm
